the most perfect day.

day 4. Our day began with a "clearing" chi qong exercise followed by the healing meditation. I wonder what life would be like if we started every day this way. We all felt so relaxed and centered. We had an interesting lecture on personal wellness and did a brillant exercise I want to share. We were asked the question "what would you do just for yourself if you had": a) < 5 min, b) < 30 min, c) < 1 hr, d) < 2hr, e) half a day, and f) a whole day? The point that was trying to be made was that you can create a "vacation" anytime you want. We all shared what we would do with that time, mine include: < 5 min = make cha; < 30 min = call a friend/family member; < 1hr = cook a meal; < 2 hr = go to a yoga class; half a day = diy project; a whole day = have a gathering with friends. Then to our suprise our teacher informed us that there was no "next" lecture and that we had 2 hours off to do anything we wanted, like a vacation. Wow. I was blown away. Brillant exercise, right? I thought so. Two of the many incredibly amazing people I have met, spent that time getting manicures/pedicures while sipping on fresh carrot juice :) followed by a yoga class. It was perfect. Again, just when I thought the day could get no better, it did. We all met at a friend's place to gather before dinner. He lives in a traditional adobe style home...when you walk in the front door, it's what I imagine walking into heaven must be like. It's breathtakingly beautiful. There's greenery everywhere and the house is so well connected to the outdoors it gives me chills. I will certainly take pictures my next visit so you can get a glimpse, it really is amazing. We ended the evening eating tapas from a lovely spanish restaurant...this has been a mind-blowingly awesome experience and it's only day 4 :)

tuscon = best kept secret.

day 3. We began our morning with a chi gong exercise, toe tapping, while listening to the sounds of drums...what a unique start to our day.
It was followed by a healing meditation and then yoga, which made me smile (and I haven't stopped since). I absolutely love yoga and all the benefits that come from it. I was reminded of a simple truth today, "without the breath, there is no yoga". The breath is everything.

Just when I thought the day could not get any better we began a discussion on medical intuition. Really? I can hardly contain my excitement! Everything I am learning is so in line with my thinking it seems unreal. I have always felt "different" for my perspectives when amongst my colleagues, but now I feel like I have been united with a community of similar views. See, I have a vision for my integrative practice and it's the type of vision they are promoting here...it's incredible!

We talked about the unique relationship between a physician and a patient. I can't tell you how hard my heart has become over the past 7 years of my medical training. It's a result of many things, one I believe is from time constraints and being told repeatedly that I'm too sensitive. Here they encourage authenticity and really connecting with patients, born from a wholistic mindset. It reminds me of why I choose to pursue medicine...everyday I get the feeling of "chills", it's awesome. Lastly, we talked about using nutrition to bring the body back to a state of health...a topic I find absolutely fascinating and will certainly return to.

I'll leave you with this, each moment brings an opportunity for something new...what new experience will you have today?

feel like i am dreaming.

Today is day 2 of my time out in Tuscon learning about integrative medicine. Wow. I mean really wow. I am truly at a loss of words when I attempt to explain what I am experiencing and all that is happening to me from within mostly because it feels unreal. On our first day we created an alter as a group to 'alter' our space and had a ceremony to unite us as one, as a community of healers. It was like nothing I have ever experienced before. Imagine a room full of physicians in a circle, feet touching, one hand on our heart and another hand on the back of the person next to us. It really was a moment of awe and inspiration. We all walked away a little shifted. It's incredible to be amongst a group of individuals who share similar perspectives. It really is amazing. Our conversations include anything from juicing, to daily yoga (we went to an evening class for $4), anti-inflammatory diets to botanicals to energy healing...I could go on. I can't stop smiling and now I understand what happiness truly feels like. I haven't experienced it like this before, it's every moment in the day. It's freaking incredible. Every moment feels like I am in the best dream ever...I am finally doing what I've always imagined. Very surreal.

a gathering of great women.

our diy infinity scarfs!

there is nothing better than spending an evening amongst friends enjoying laughter, wine, & food!

ginger love.

I'm feeling a bit under the weather today and thanks to the suggestion of a friend...I have been introduced to a new winter love: hot water infused with ginger and honey...incredibly soothing with a twist of invigoration. doesn't it sound tempting?

my new challange.

' live below your means, but within your needs' has become my inspiration of recent and my latest challenge. I'm trying to live off half my resident salary, which isn't much I know, we'll see what comes of it...

tragedy.

This month in the ICU has been extremely challenging in many different ways. My body is physically exhausted-I've never felt so sleep deprived. I've been forced to overcome my needle stick rather quickly. My heart is heavy for the patient's I've lost and today in particular is a sad day for me. I've been helping care for a young gentleman, only 39 years old, who was admitted to our ICU a short 5 days ago with Steven Johnson's syndrome and respiratory failure likely secondary to a medication he was recently given to treat bronchitis or an ear infection, the documentation is unclear. An extremely unfortunate situation. Yesterday we discovered that he had profound swelling in his brain and ultimately that his brain was not functioning. I'm not sure how this happened. He continued to clinically deteriorate today and given his prognosis the family made the decision to withdraw care. He has a wife and a daughter who is only 1 years old. I can't even swallow the reality of what has happened and how quickly their lives have changed as a result of this outcome. My soul aches. And for reasons I can't seem to understand, the words of his wife keep repeating in my head: 'all he did was take a medication' . This could happen to anyone of us, it's absolutely tragic and heart wrenching to say the least. The icu has been a brutal reminder of both the uncertainty of life and the importance of cherishing each moment in life.